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Shut It Down Shut It Down

The United States government has shut down for the second time in five years.

Chaos Weary Chaos Weary

About a year ago, in early 2017, I briefly joined a stress-management program that functioned sort of like a support group. I was feeling brittle and panicked; alongside millions of other Americans, the generalized anxiety that normally keeps me company had grown exponentially in the aftermath of the 2016 election.

Please Try to Keep Your Breakfast Down While Reading Stormy Daniels on Her Alleged Affair with Donald Trump! Please Try to Keep Your Breakfast Down While Reading Stormy Daniels on Her Alleged Affair with Donald Trump!

Bright and early Friday morning, In Touch Weekly published in full their interview with Stormy Daniels, the porn actor who was allegedly paid $130,000 for her silence about their reported affair. It is long-ranging, comprehensive, and detailed enough about the sex stuff that reading it while eating toast or a bowl of…

Donald Trump Allegedly Had Stormy Daniels Spank Him With a Fucking Forbes Magazine Donald Trump Allegedly Had Stormy Daniels Spank Him With a Fucking Forbes Magazine

Welcome to Barf Bag, a daily politics roundup to help you sort through the chaotic Trumpian news cycle.

Trump's 'Fake News Awards' Turned Out to Be a Poorly Functioning Web Page  Trump's 'Fake News Awards' Turned Out to Be a Poorly Functioning Web Page 

As one of his first orders of the new year, the very night he taunted a world leader on Twitter by insinuating simultaneously the possibility of nuclear war and that of his own dick working, President Donald Trump announced that he would produce a “MOST DISHONEST & CORRUPT MEDIA AWARDS OF THE YEAR” on “Monday at 5:00…

Jeff Flake Says All the Right Things in Speech Comparing Trump to Joseph Stalin 

Outgoing Republican Senator Jeff Flake gave another speech on the Senate floor today denouncing his party’s president, elaborating on the same “daily sundering of our country” he mentioned last time. A day after a similar op-ed by his colleague John McCain ran in the Washington Post, Flake defended the free press…

The President's Brain Is Fine, Doctor Insists  The President's Brain Is Fine, Doctor Insists 

Welcome to Barf Bag, a daily politics roundup to help you sort through the chaotic Trumpian news cycle.

Donald 'I Am Not a Racist' Trump Ditches MLK Day Event for Golf  Donald 'I Am Not a Racist' Trump Ditches MLK Day Event for Golf 

Just days after calling Haiti and all of Africa “shithole countries” and saying he doesn’t want people from there in America, how exactly did our very racist president spend Martin Luther King Day? According to the Washington Post, he did not attend a memorial event honoring the civil rights leader. Instead, Trump…

Ugggghh, Trump And I Have Something In Common Ugggghh, Trump And I Have Something In Common

I was afraid this moment would come. When I clicked on this Washington Post story about Trump’s blood-sucking sycophants and the lengths to which they’ll go to curry the dumb baby’s favor, I felt a dull thud of recognition in my stomach, like a pebble landing—plunk—in a pond. It turns out the poorly-bleached anus and…

Donald Trump Claims He Is Not Racist, Even Though He Definitely Is Donald Trump Claims He Is Not Racist, Even Though He Definitely Is

Donald Trump, a man who kicked off his presidential campaign by claiming Mexican immigrants were rapists and criminals, told reporters at a press pool event in Florida on Sunday night that he is “not a racist” and is in fact “the least racist person you have ever interviewed.” The latter statement could be true,…

Trump Vehemently Denies Paying off Adult Film Actress Harboring Nightmares of Tighty-Whities  Trump Vehemently Denies Paying off Adult Film Actress Harboring Nightmares of Tighty-Whities 

Who wants to play Bad Man headline bingo? Nobody, but today’s picks are: Trump; sexual encounter; adult film actress; tighty-whities; attorney; nondisclosure agreement; payment. According to the Wall Street Journal, Donald Trump’s lawyer arranged for a $130,000 payment to Stephanie Clifford, former adult film actress,…

Trump Once Asked Why a 'Pretty Korean Lady' Analyst Wasn't Negotiating With North Korea Trump Once Asked Why a 'Pretty Korean Lady' Analyst Wasn't Negotiating With North Korea

Welcome to Barf Bag, a daily politics roundup to help you sort through the chaotic Trumpian news cycle.

No Shit, Donald Trump Is Racist No Shit, Donald Trump Is Racist

Donald Trump is racist as shit, but the world already knew that. So when he called a few countries populated primarily by black and brown people “shithole countries” and asked, “Why are we having all these people from shithole countries come here?” I was disgusted, but not especially shocked.

Donald Trump Is Still a Racist Donald Trump Is Still a Racist

Welcome to Barf Bag, a daily politics roundup to help you sort through the chaotic Trumpian news cycle.

New York State Senator Accused of Forcibly Kissing Staffer New York State Senator Accused of Forcibly Kissing Staffer

Welcome to Barf Bag, a daily politics roundup to help you sort through the chaotic Trumpian news cycle.

Roseanne Confirms What We Knew All Along Roseanne Confirms What We Knew All Along

Roseanne Barr promised the new Roseanne reboot would not be about Donald Trump. She did not promise that the Conners wouldn’t be Trump supporters, so now they are. Of course.

In Despicable Move, the Trump Administration Kicks 200,000 Salvadorans Out of the U.S.  In Despicable Move, the Trump Administration Kicks 200,000 Salvadorans Out of the U.S. 

Welcome to Barf Bag, a daily politics roundup to help you sort through the chaotic Trumpian news cycle.

Oh No, the President's Fake News Awards Have Been Rescheduled Oh No, the President's Fake News Awards Have Been Rescheduled

Donald Trump made a series of memorable tweets last week, but somewhere between taunting North Korea with the threat of nuclear war and declaring himself a “stable genius,” the President used his favorite bully pulpit to announce he’d be handing out awards to the “Fake News Media” for all the very dishonest and unfair…

The Democratic Party Is Tweeting About Mean Girls The Democratic Party Is Tweeting About Mean Girls

Typically the GOP is known for the political zingers, but on Saturday the Democratic Party tried its hand at Photoshop. The resulting relatable meme-hopeful popped up on the official Democratic Party’s Twitter feed:

'More Than Half a Dozen' White House Staffers Are Reportedly Considering Quitting 'More Than Half a Dozen' White House Staffers Are Reportedly Considering Quitting

The White House may see a mass exodus of staffers in the coming weeks. Axios reports that in the wake of Michael Wolff’s tell-all book, Fire and Fury: Inside the Trump White House, “[m]ore than half a dozen of the more skilled White House staff are contemplating imminent departures,” and “[m]any leaving are quite…

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